Time

Isn't it mostly true that we "take time" for the things that are important. My challenge and question to you and myself is.... "Aren't YOU important?".

Take time for "you" TODAY!

Blessings to you my family and friends.

A New Journey

Have you ever set out on a journey? I have, and there's been many different journeys. Some journeys are very well planned out - like a vacation. You have an itinerary, know the costs, know whom you're going with, when you're going, when you're coming back - nicely laid out plans. Ahh......... and you're set... off you go to have fun.

Why is it, I ask, that some journeys are more difficult than planning a vacation? I've been on a weight loss journey for the past 6 months. A literal roller coaster.... started out great, had a plan, was losing the pounds, and then wham!! An emotional setback hit in March that set me into a tailspin of emotional eating... at times I still struggle. Yeah, you see I'm like a million other folks that are emotional eaters... emotions set folks like us into non-stop, non-conscious eating. And dare I say, not the best or healthiest of choices.

We eat when we're angry, sad, bored, and the reality of it is our emotions turn to food for comfort! Not a good or healthy combination, but hey, I know it's there and believe you me I'm working on "taming that beast". One can "choose", and believe it or not "have power" over food. What a concept, huh?

Let's change the mind frame - Food becomes fuel, becomes energy... vs. comfort. Food no longer is comfort for angry feelings, sad feelings, boredom, or even loneliness. Food simply is food.. a fuel to nourish and power the body. As I type this I am convincing and re-programming my mind to believe... the goal here (the journey) is a shift of mindset to healthy eating that becomes second nature; A permanent way of life. My journey and goal is to say goodbye to "the beast" of emotional eating. I do have a "choice" and "power" over it.

Join me as I start my weight loss journey. An adventure into self discovery really. I suspect that not only will I change to healthy eating habits but I might just find I do a bit of housecleaning in all aspects of my life.

Now, how to get this all planned out carefully.... I suspect I will take the approach of a well planned vacation. It takes planning, a desire to get to your destination, and more important to have fun!

So...... here we go..... the journey has begun.

All in perspective

Mother Nature has a way of bringing life into perspective.
The human race has, in this writers' opinion felt bigger
and more powerful than many things.

However, and I say however, let's take Mother Nature for example.
The Wind can feel pleasant on a warm summers' day/night.
The Wind can also chill you to the bone in sub-zero temperatures.
The Wind can even bring death... destruction... when
she forms tropical storms and hurricanes. Are we more powerful?

Water. Oh how I love being near the water. The Warm tropical
climates with a warm sandy beach and an ocean as far as one
can see. The water caresses your body as you slip into it and
can soothe an aching body and soul. Too much water in a torrential
downpour, flash flood, or tsunami can bring death. Are we more
powerful?

Mother Earth herself is amazing. So many beautiful sites, so many
shapes. Flat ground, soft ground, hills, mountains, valleys, a variety of shapes
across her canvas. Yet the earth can shake, it can slide, and it can bring
death if caught in her path. Are we more powerful?

Why such deep thoughts? Well, the past couple days I've hiked
many miles along the ridges and mists of Mount Diablo.
Beautiful country, just outside the hustle and bustle of city life.
Here I felt so small amongst the winding paths and trees. Sometimes
the hills were so steep I felt they would defeat me. Sometimes I felt the
presence of the animals watching - though we could not see. They only
left their tracks, their body a ghost to us ..... fresh tracks. Wild boars, raccoons and
coyotes. In the middle of nowhere, yet so close to civilization I crept
into a different world, if just for awhile. Alone with Mother Nature and
her creatures.

Today, I faced 5 big bulls on our trek through the foothills. Some standing
in our path. Did I ever feel small! As we approached my thoughts raced,
what if he charges, can I run fast enough? Find a tree to climb? Or will I
face a fate I'd like to not think about? Luckily all 5 were content in their
field of cows -- ever watchful as we past. Some only 10 feet away. I did get brave
and snapped a couple pictures. I mean if I did face a bull at least I'd have a picture
to say "hey, this is the one that did it" . All kidding aside, one feels small
next to a 1200 pound animal in the open, in the middle of no where. It is
also invigorating too! Talk about getting your blood pumping.

The morning air was crisp and cool both days. Seeing your breath as you
walked. Soon as your body moved more you felt warm even though the
grasses around you, covered in frost, told you it was still very cold out.

The hills from afar do not look that tall or big. When faced with climbing one or
two you realize their beauty, their height, and the challenge to get to the
top. If one doesn't slip or slide (as it was wet out both days), the view from
the top is breath-taking.... worth the climb.

One realizes just how small they are in a world were mankind
feels so big and powerful. Mother Nature has a gentle way of reminding
us just how small we are in the midst of it all. Mother Nature has
a way of bringing an appreciation back to life, to living. Take a walk
in her and she won't disappoint. You may be surprised when she
quietly enters your soul and whispers her wisdom to you. She's worth
the Walk.

---------------
May the beauty of Mother Earth bring her wisdom and life to you
my family and friends. Many blessings to you this day and always.

Moments

Woke with a song in my heart, Glory be to God
Woke with a feeling of joy, knowing everything would be okay
Woke with a feeling of Mom right beside, though I can't see
Surprised that tears did not come to me. For she has risen
and is with our Lord, safely home in heaven above able
to reach out to all her family at once, she can be with
everyone now, spreading her love and joy.

Sitting on the cold grass of the cemetery I no longer feel
like I need to dig her up. Yes her body is there, however her
spirit soars with Angels high. Sitting on the cold grass I
stare at her name on the marble grave marker.... 1936-2009
a short time here on earth. A time when she blessed all those
she knew and loved. Even those that never knew her, she
prayed for them, faithfully daily... this she did I can assure you.

Sitting with brother, and my nieces I
puffed on a peach cigar (sorry mom) offered to me by brother.
Contemplating life, contemplating how short 73 years can be
yet how profound an impact a life can make.

Hard to walk away, sitting there for a long while, just staring
at her name... feeling how lucky I am to have a Mom like "my Mom".

I miss you Mom, I know you are in a joyous and peaceful place.
Know that we raise our hearts and our prayers to you this day...
And thank you for leading us and guiding us on our way.

Merry Christmas Momma-sita, you ARE the BEST!

And then it surprises you...

Wow! Talk about a strange feeling. I write about "da hood" and then "da hood" surprises me with a warmth that melted my heart.

25-30 Christmas Carolers, all carrying lit candles come out of the alley way, singing their hearts out door to door. It is the little surprises and kindness from all walks of life, even from "da hood" that make one realize that we are all the same, made of his likeness and his love. This is the season about Jesus, and he shines even in places where there are many struggles.

Thank you Jesus for the reminder of "love" and "goodness" - for it can and is everywhere if we look beyond the troubles and issues that sometimes can plaque our steets.

Living in 'da hood

Livin in da hood
itsa educational thang
livin in the hood
always colorful, nutin bland
blue or red, black n white
gotta get it straight or
ya might disappear in
plain site .... gotta have da dough
on the 15th and the 1st
cuz that's when the
wind blows allotta the snow
too cold for you, getta little
skunk, bright and green, if that's
ur thang. Livin in da hood
gets tuffer every day tryin
make a livin and move on
to better thangs.

Phew... Okay, that was difficult to write. But hey, it's been one of those observational days in the hood here for me. May my prayers be heard for a better place to be, may 2010 bring continued blessings to my family and me.

Christmas Spirit find me please

Oh Christmas Spirit find me
I need you so
Christmas Spirit lift me
My heart has may whoas
Christmas Spirit help me
feel the beauty of this time
Remind me of the Blessing
That represents Christmas Time

Feeling down and blue
My Momma is with you
Oh God I wish I could see her
Just for one more time
Until you bring us home to
you, My faith it will remain

I'm trying hard to find your
Joy, to chase my blues away

Oh Christmas time please
find me, this night for when I sleep
So that you may shine through
me to the people that I meet

Time

When will it be time
When time is on your side
When time takes your breath away
When time washes away the tears
Brings joy and happiness unsurpassed

When, where are you father time
Did you pass me by
Is this all temporary while I walk this path
A time warp it feels, long, winding...
When will you bring something more, is there more
More than the mind and heart can imagine

Time, a gift, uncertain at times, whispers
my name, softly, gently, I'm waiting this day

Dancing Trees and Whirlwind Leaves

Wind, can you hear? Can you feel? Can you see? The WIND.

Oh yes it is certainly blowing out there.

Mother nature making music through the trees, the leaves, the shrubbery and more.
Whistling around the corners of fences, houses, cars, anything ... any size any shape.
Whistling the windy tune, high pitched and low groans. Natures music.

Trees, mostly quiet and still now shake and dance, reaching out, reaching over.
Freeing their leaves to dance, a whirled dance along walkways, breezeways
and roadways. Jubilant to be out and about, the colors whirl about, mixing
creating magic in the wind.

Step out into the wind, don't curse it, rather feel it, sense it, as nature does
and soak in the musical wind of the day.

H1N1 go away!

As I type this, I fear that I have picked up the H1N1 flu bug. Oh yes, this nasty little bug has scared the *%*#* out of me when my child ended up in a ER bed with IV's. Fever off the scale, and the poor little thing in tears she was in so much physical pain. As she recuperates (still not there), I am trying hard to stay healthy myself.

However, sometime today a big Mac truck has plowed into me. I keep taking my temperature and it's normal. My mouth and throat feel "funny" (can't describe), and my body just aches. I just need to get through dinner tonite, get my child her breathing treatments, get her into bed and okay, then I will drop. Which brings me to a Mother's strength.

Where does it come from? It prevails so many times over things it should not. A Mother's strength to hold a sick child, to kiss a boo-boo and make it better, to keep a house running, to let a child know it will be okay, and Mommy's here. I miss my own mother terribly right now. She gave me strength to be a better Mom. Right now I am digging deep and am afraid for the first time of getting sick and not being able to care for my child who is fighting this horrible H1N1.

I put my Faith in God. I trust He will guide me and He will keep us safe and heal us. For those reading this prayers would be good as well.

To my family and friends, be well, stay healthy.

Barney (aka Patty)