Ever wonder? 
Do you ever wonder the "whys" to life?  Do you ever wonder about the "hows" in life?  Do you ever wonder the "whats" to life?  Why am I here, how do I live the life my creator planned for me, and what is it I am supposed to be doing? 

Although we were given "free will", this writer believes that God ultimately has a plan laid out for us.  Sometimes we get side-tracked, off-track, or on the wrong-track; and that is okay, even those times are all part of the "why" for us.  Each interaction, each breath, each moment all part of a bigger picture for humanity; for those that we encounter and for ourselves. 

How would our lives change if we were to see the blueprint laid out for us? Would we be where we are today?  Would things have been different?  Perhaps yes, perhaps no.  If we were given that glimpse, we might change things and that change would change things for others as well. 

I believe at the end of our days we'll see that blueprint and any unanswered questions; our whys, our pains, our grief, will be perfectly laid out for the bigger picture and we'll see the good that came out of each moment.  Whether that moment was happy, sad, painful, or something else; we'll finally have the answers to all our unanswered questions, and we'll say "I get it all now" .... and we will smile.  That one thought is what keeps this writer plugging along on this journey called life.

~Barney Beagle (aka Patty)

2018 - It's time to blog again.

This writer has been on the sideline for too long. 

More to come.

As we say farewell.....

In just 5 days we will say farewell.  You've been good to me, I must say, although there have been some bumps along the way, there has always been a silver lining (gently tucked away).  Thank you for opening my heart to always see the silver lining, no matter what the circumstance. 

Despite that it will be farewell in just 5 short days.  You will become the past, 2011, and I, along with many others, will welcome in 2012.  Hard to believe, but true.  Where did you go?  You came and went so quickly, and now, soon, you will be gone, forever. 

2012.... wow!  Hard to believe.  Waiting silently, soon to make a grand entrance... count down.  I know you will be as true and good to me as 2011 was.  My much anticipated thought is ... even better.  So although I am getting ready to say farewell to a wonderfully good year, I know you, the new, will be even brighter.

Breathe

Breathe.... something, perhaps that is taken for granted.
You breathe in, you breathe out, without much thought, if really none at all.

Then one day you have to "think" to breathe.  It's frightening really.
Breathe in, breathe out, don't gag, don't choke, please airway stay open...
one more time and I can rest, my lungs can feel right

Sleep..... can be scary.  Awoken to the gasping for air because the
lungs don't want to work or are so restricted and tight it's like gasping
for air underwater.... doesn't work too well.

So I sit propped up, wondering will my lungs clear and relax?  Will the
act of breathing be that of not much thought?  Just something the body does
without struggle?

Be gentle to yourself, listen to your body, it speaks to you, lets you know
when it's stressed or trying to fight an infection......... find time to rest and take care.

This writer, for now, is thankful for modern medicine, nurses and MD's that are
helping me to breathe... my prayer and hope is soon it will be mindless and
not a struggle.

Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in breathe out.... soon it will all be carefree.

Blessings

Writers block -  is a condition, associated with writing, in which the writer loses the ability to produce new work. The condition varies widely in intensity. It can be trivial, a temporary difficulty in dealing with the task in hand.... ... sound familiar writers?  Oh... it does to me.   This is where I have to remember to "free write".  At least 20 minutes a day.  That in and of itself always seems to get the creative flow moving (or at least that is the hope)

A pleasant day today - spent the better part of the morning with family and friends over coffee.  Fun, jovial kidding around and simply enjoying the company of each other.

The rain fell, sometimes hard at times (skipping rain as we call it).  The fog seemed to lift a bit, a teaser that the blue sky might, just might make an appearance between the bursts of rain.  For a moment I did see blue sky which gave me a smile.  The artistry of mother nature is always constant, sometimes amusing if one pays attention.

A lone hawk graced my path more than once today... a message from the spirit world, lending the wisdom of it's kind.... the hawk spirit graced me with her attributes this day.... quietly I thank and listen for her message, careful not to let the world drown out my ability to receive.

Last night I saw Camel (yes a Camel) and I think of what the Camel spirit represents... Camel is telling you that even though things may seem difficult at the moment, trust that you have the resources to get through this challenging time in your life.

Two interesting totems to cross my path this day.......


As I sit and give thanks for the many blessings in my life, I give thanks to the heavens for guiding me on my spiritual journey of self discovery, joy and peace. I am surrounded by family and friends, a blessing.  I am surrounded by supportive and caring people, a blessing.  I am truly blessed and give thanks this day.

Sung to the Tune of "Grandma got run over by a reindeer"

Ladies and Gents what a "memorable" get-together.  Looking forward to the next one......... hmmmmmmmmm

Roxy lost her money at the saloon,
Playing Texas Hold'em with the boys.

Slinky & Ginger really tried to help her,
But Shotsy made it worsen with more cheer

Cougar, Lucky Texas saw it coming
Fun Size said she really didn't care.

Cougar in the corner with a Fun Guy
& Roxy now has lost her underwear.

Zora & Lolita to the resucue
Ziggy, Zappy followed in the rear.

Santa said he couldn't help 'ole Cotsy
Have another shot and slam a beer!

Ho Ho HO!

This Day

I ask myself what did I do with "this Day"?
Did I make a difference?  Did I help another? Did I nourish a soul?  Did I nourish myself?
What did I do with "this Day"?

Life's unexpected twists and turns this past year and half have basically thrown me into a mode of "questioning". Questioning day-to-day actions, questioning the journey.  Oh, how it is so human to question, when in reality it is not for us to question or to understand, for it is truly in God's hands, and in His hands we must trust.

This evening I sit listening to the pitter patter of the rain.  Listening to the flute playing in the background, and listening to the click-clack-click of the keyboard keys.  Feeling a need to, a call to action, but what is that action? 

I will sit in silence this eve and wait in wonder and anticipation to hear, and to perhaps have a clearer feeling as to what that action my be.

Perhaps rather than ask myself "What did I do this day?", perhaps I should wait in anticipation for the directions of what to do next, not to question, but to listen whole-heartily, and then act.

Blessings to you my family and friends.

Silent Crys

Can you hear me, I'm at your door
Can you hear me, I'm hungry, can you spare a bit more

Thrown in to this world, cause man didn't care
Got them a new house and they left me here

Why would they do this, I thought they cared
A new house a new place why not include me

Alone in the cold, alone in the dark,
Next thing I knew I had babies, what a start
The joy of them warms me, there's horror as well
how can I feed them, it's dark and it's cold,
..... there's no one who cares

So now I scratch and I scrap to barely get by
some of my babies are weak, and some they will die

I reach out to people, most shoo me away
some try to feed me, but get tired, I'm a stray

Then one night some food came out like a dream
some of my babies were fed and were freed

Freed from the street, from the scraping and pain
I hope that they find love, a home, perhaps one for me

The cage with the food it scares me and them
Deep inside I know it's that or we'll all end up dead

Dead from starvation or caught in some snare
A snare of the world comes quickly


If you can read this I want you to know
I don't understand why you left me alone

The love that I gave you, unconditional and more
I guess that a new place was something much more

I don't understand, and I forgive you I guess
but my body grows weary from hunger and unrest

May your new house keep you, and not do to you,
Cause if it doesn't work out it might toss you out too


Written on behalf of all the abandoned animals that are so shamelessly left behind.

I can feel you

Silent fears, shared fears
Dreams, Hopes, Stories and more
Joy, hope, pain, anguish
Laughter, whispers, anger, even hate
Baby cries, tears of joy, triumph, welcome here
Last breathe, tears of sorrow, mourning, heaven home
News hard to bear
News to bring joy
All this whirls through my being and my soul
and more.....

I can feel you as I walk
Walk through my day
I pray, although we may not speak, I don't know you

Know that I can hear you, almost feel you
Oh please have Faith
For I pray for you, and He knows your name

Blessings to you my Family and Friends.